Everybody Hates Houseguests

Everybody Hates Houseguests was the seventh episode of the third season of Everybody Hates Chris. It was the 51st episode overall. It premired on November 12, 2007.

SHORT SUMMARY: With his dad out of town, Greg comes to stay at Chris' house and gets special treatment from Rochelle, which upsets Chris. Meanwhile, Julius gets a job as a cab driver and takes a passenger named Eddie (Tommy Davidson) on a road trip to Las Vegas for $1000 despite his initial reluctance to do so. Unfortunately, Eddie is a bank robber.

Narrator: Greg had brought so much stuff, I couldn't tell if he was stayin' over or takin' over.
Chris: You wearin' Transformers pajamas? Man, you're 15!
Greg: I like to pray as different characters. That way God doesn't get bored with me. Tonight I'm Optimus Prime, leader of the Autobots. [in a robotic voice] Now I lay me down to sleep, I pray the Lord my soul to keep. Amen.
Narrator: He should pray for some self-esteem!

the kids are watching TV]
Greg: What are you doing?
Chris: Turning to MacGyver.
Greg: But I wanted to watch NOVA.
Tonya: NOVA?!? What is that?
Greg: It's a show on PBS about science as it relates to the universe.
Drew: Cool! That's almost like MacGyver.
Chris: Just like Lawrence Welk is like Soul Train.
Rochelle: Chris, Greg is your guest. Let him watch NOVA. [to Greg, serving dessert] Gelato?
Narrator: Is that Italian for "Jell-O?"
Greg: Thanks!
Narrator: I thought havin' Greg stay over would be fun. Probably what the Indians thought when they first saw Columbus.

Chris: Hey, Greg. What's up?
Greg: My dad's going out of town for a week. I have to stay with my grandmother. Not looking forward to it.
Chris: Why not?
[Greg and his grandmother are at a German party and a banner saying "Willkommen Greg!" is above everyone]
Greg's Grandmother: Left, right, left heel, right, left, right…

Greg: [angrily] Why didn't you wake me up?
Chris: You told me you didn't want me to do anything for you, so I didn't.
Greg: That didn't mean I wanted you to let me sleep through school. I missed the quarterly history test!
Chris: Well, maybe you shoulda gone to bed dressed as Superman. That way you coulda flown to school. [walks away]
Narrator: Good thing he doesn't have heat vision.

Narrator: Back at school, Greg was catching up on more than his studies.
Ms. Morello: What year did the American Revolution begin, Greg? Greg?!?
Greg: [waking up] 1942.
Ms. Morello: Greg, what's wrong with you? You're usually so alert.
Chris: It's because he's staying at my house for a week.
Ms. Morello: Oh my God, he's drunk?!? Did he have a 40 for breakfast?
Greg: I'm not drunk. I'm just not used to getting up so early.
Ms. Morello: Don't be ashamed. Chris' people have a history of being up when the rooster crows to go to work in the fields. Who could expect you to keep up? Go back to sleep.
Narrator: She was Don Imus in a dress.

Julius: How was it havin' Greg over?
Chris: Cool. Can he stay over again sometime?
Rochelle: Are you nuts?! I never worked so hard in my entire life!
Drew: And I want my bed back!
Tonya: And she is not makin' me eat no more tofu.
Julius: Whoa, you gave your brother's bed to Greg?!
Drew: And you sit up here washin' dishes for the white man!
Tonya: And that little TV show NOVA was boring!
Rochelle: I'm tired of bein' a vegetarian short-order cook!

To watch the full episode click HERE

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